Confessions of a Culinary Con Artist

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It’s true.  I’m a con artist.  I guess it wouldn’t be so bad if I could successfully con other people but the actual victim here is me.  It started long ago but took on a life of its own in this millennium.  Let me tell you, I can talk a good game.  I can say all the right things and get my dietary support staff to buy in with excitement and enthusiasm.

Here’s how the con works.  I reach the end of my rope.  I join/ subscribe/ purchase the latest greatest diet craze.  I create a plan.  I write it down and I create a fancy spreadsheet to quantify my progress and predict the date of completion and success.  I pay hundreds of dollars (the best one was hypnosis for $1,800 in four EASY payments!) then eat to my heart’s content until the first appointment/meetings begin/book arrives.

I am a model citizen at the beginning.  I can say all the right things to the Weight Watchers leader so she anticipates my weigh in every week.  Usually by week four she is already talking to me about reaching goal and becoming a leader myself.  I can film a video with the director of the hypnosis center so compelling that he cannot wait to use it in his advertisements.  I can charm a personal trainer by using buzz words like commitment, lifetime and endorphin.

But I hit my con artist brick wall this past fall.  I started working with a nutritionist in July.  I poured my heart out.  I shared my failures with her.  She took my before picture and gave me great stuff to read.  She cared about me, I mean, really cared about me.  I even admitted to her in August that I am capable of saying all the right things and am good at starting but not very good at follow through.  It was the first time I ever said that out loud and I think it is because it is the first time I began to see the con for what it was.

Con: –noun

4. a confidence game or swindle.

5. a lie, exaggeration, or glib self-serving talk

Eventually, as I missed appointments and slid back to my old ways, I began for the first time to understand my tactics and how destructive they were.  I was embarrassed to go back because I saw something in her eyes which was different than I had ever seen in anyone who was “helping” me before.  She was really, sincerely disappointed.  She really believed in me and the disappointment I saw was like a wet glove being slapped on my face.  That one single look, which she may not even know crossed her face, was the jolt I needed.  I stopped the con cold turkey in January.

Things are different now.  When the con stopped I didn’t eat like crazy until I developed a plan.  There is no fancy spreadsheet although I do keep track of what I eat every day making sure my body is fueled with protein.  I have no date of completion because that would assume I am dead.  This is not a diet.  I will never diet again (that, in and of itself, is entirely freeing!) but simply eat like a healthy person every day.

Would you like to read more about my journey?

Have a yummy week!

Jude

Twitter: @JudeTheFoodie

 

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7 thoughts on “Confessions of a Culinary Con Artist

  1. So grateful you shared this. I myself am discovering my own con, my disconnect between what I know and what I feel & live.

  2. WOW! Thank you! You made my day…although it came from a negative (my kids know that look, intensified by 1,000!), it’s so rewarding to know I was able to reach you and help you change your outlook on food and healthy living. You were ready to hear the message…I’m sure I told you that I say the same words day after day and only a small percentage hear them. Congratulations and best wishes to stay the course and continue your journey of health!! Enjoy the simple goodness of each new day!

  3. Jude, thank you for sharing that great insight about dieting and eating right. I have gained 35 lbs since being in my wheelchair and I’m miserable. I’ve talked about going to see a nutritionist as a few of my friends have done it. They were very successful. One gal lost half of herself (well over 100 lbs.) I didn’t even recognize her. So I am going to heed your advice and get “going”.

    You just confirmed it for me. God bless you. I am so very proud of you and what you will accomplish. Love to see my daughter do the same.

    Thank you again. Love, Barb

    • Life is constant discovery.

      Maria – I understand what you mean by it coming from a negative but I do not actually see it that way. It came from a positive – I came to see you and was open to the message. Rarely do we know when we make the connection and the message was not received instantly. I was sort of on tape delay!

      Amy – what is the saying – the first step is admitting (_fill in the blank_)? We all look over our shoulders way too much. I am proud of your path and you must be, too!

      Barb – as I wrote in my blog, Maria (nutritionist extraordinaire – I wish you lived in Western New York – she is wonderful) helped me with my aha moment. You may find going to someone now, while you are still immobile, will help you so much. Regarding your daughter (who I love so much) – you cannot want something more than someone else does. The biggest leap I took on this very early part of my journey was the uderstanding that I am doing this only for myself. I’m not doing it for Tom and I’m not doing it for my mom. Just me. Only me. I have never felt so free in my life.

  4. Pingback: The con artist and the dog lover | Byline to Finish Line

  5. That’s so true Jude. Everyone has to admit to themselves and only they can change it or make it happen. If I can just do it for myself, I will be extremely happy. Thanks again. Love you,

  6. Pingback: Life With a Lap Band…It’s Just Food! | Jude The Foodie

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